Someday

Someday…

Someday I would like to run away.

Not anywhere in this world, but somewhere far, far away.

In my mind’s eye I can nearly see it – a lush green meadow, brimming with sunlight, and blissfully empty.

There I will drop the facade I am forced to carry around everyday, and be me…me with abandon.

I will RUN.

I will run, obscenely fast, till the wind in my ears drowns out all thoughts and feelings – no grief, no love, no happiness.

I will run till I can run no more, and then I will fall down on the grass (damn my allergies!), and I will SCREAM!!!

I will SCREAM.

Scream till I can scream no more – scream HATE and scream LOVE…feelings too obscene to be spoken about directly in our twilight world of dainty manners. It’s not ‘right’ to love too much; it’s not right to take anything so to heart. Tread lightly, they tell me, it’s the only proper thing to do. Don’t let anyone affect you, and if they do – for heaven’s sake – don’t tell me, lest we both drown.

I WILL SCREAM AND THERE WILL BE NO EARS TO JUDGE.

I will LAUGH!

Laugh so hard that tears fall down my cheeks, and my knees buckle with mirth. The kind of laughter that provokes Destiny.

I will CRY.

Crying isn’t becoming. Sorrow is a plague. Hide your tears under make-up and shallow words. But I will WEEP…someday, the ocean within me shall get its deserved release.

I will DANCE.

I will move with abandon, sing breathlessly, and –

I will LIVE.

 

 

Someday…soon…but not today.

A To-Do List awaits me.

But…

Someday…

Not Today.

 

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