Am I beautiful?

Have you ever looked at a mirror, and just – suddenly – thought, ” Oh wow! I am beautiful”. Has it ever happened that you couldn’t tear your gaze away from your own face?
It happened to me today. I was dressed in my loose t-shirt – one that makes me look like a hippopotamus, but is really comfortable; and I caught my reflection in a store-window, and for a moment my breath caught as I realized that I looked beautiful….in my loose-fitting casual t-shirt; with my hair in my messy ponytail.
This doesn’t happen often for me, and if that’s true for you too, maybe it’s time we ask ourselves – why not?
We spend enough time analyzing our flaws. I have fretted hours before the mirror – bemoaning my bulging belly; complaining about the stubborn zits and pimples; whining about the tangles and split-ends in my hair, the hint of darkness over my lip, the way my glasses make my eyes squint, my non-existing thigh gap, the scar on the bridge of my nose, my wonky front tooth, my bulky and unwieldy arms….the list just goes on and on.

Why did I never take time out to just look at my reflection and think Yes! I am beautiful.

When my crush looks at me, I blush and look down, because I don’t think I am pretty enough for him. I cringe internally at the thought of him seeing all my imperfections.
But that store-window girl is pretty. If he looks at her, she should be able to look him in the eye, and smile confidently. If I am her, why don’t I?

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2 thoughts on “Am I beautiful?

  1. Beautiful! I have often caught myself wondering,staring at my reflection – Wow, I look beautiful, while unconsciously titling my head and smiling. And then as if I get concious of my own thoughts I jerk my head away to shoo the thought. Wonder why is that?
    I suffer from the same problems as you mentioned – bulky arms, uneven skin tone and ever increasing weight issues! 😀

    Like

    • I know exactly how you feel. We are so used to feeling insecure about our bodies, trying to gain that ‘perfect’ size 0 unrealistic figure, that even when we realize our own beauty we quickly dispel the thought. We are indoctrinated to always feel ashamed and inadequate, and all the cosmetic ads continually remind us of our inadequacies. I guess, sometimes, we just need to realize we can be beautiful as we are 🙂
      Thank you for reading.

      Liked by 1 person

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